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Monday, February 28, 2011

Oscar recap...

No big shock that I got all the winners correct.  Pretty easy to nail those.  I do have a friend who suggested I get some balls next year and predict Visual Effects, Sound Editing, etc...  I will take it under advisement.  Regardless of the Awards and how predictable they were...  the bigger issue is how much the show sucked.  I was never really convinced Anne Hathaway and James Franco were best suited to handle the job.  And that might have been my best prediction yet.  Hathaway is a toothy smiled goofball not quite up to the broadcast's high browed tone.  Franco, both talented and attractive (I'm told), did little more than squint and groan.  Pineapple Express this is not.  Either way I desperately needed one of them to goof on Kirk Douglas.  I mean, here is a man who suffered a debilitating stroke hitting on Hathaway???  And then he hijacks Melissa Leo's moment by making her wait and then staying in her frame.  What exactly is the point here?  Are we supposed to revere the man that was?  Admire his bravery for announcing the award live in front of a billion people worldwide?  And where the hell was Mo'Nique?  I hope she realizes the harm she caused by not presenting.  Without question that was the most embarrassing moment I have witnessed.  Shit, Dick Clark can countdown better than that.  And no one can question Clark since he produces that damn show.  So, Michael Douglas has to fight cancer and live with a wife who is aging rapidly THEN see his dad humiliate himself in front of the Galaxy???  He was Spartacus for Christ's sake!!!

Other notes...  why did Billy Crystal come out and remind us Bob Hope was host 18 times?  The AMPAS brings in younger hosts to appeal to a younger demographic and we need this info.  Does anyone 18-30 know who the fuck Bob Hope is?  If they do, do they care?  My wife asked if he died this year.  No one cares!!!  Of course she asked me if I would mention her in an acceptance speech so her credibility is questioned.

Also, at the top of the show we had a nifty CGI transition showing us Gone With The Wind, from 1939.  Again, does Young Hollywood even know about that movie?  Let alone, Carl from Wichita.  We were told that we were going to see these transitions the rest of the night celebrating Hollywood.  Maybe they did at the Theatre, but the viewers did not.

Why was Toy Story 3 nominated in the Animated Film Category?  Keep it the hell out of Best Picture then.  You cannot have it both ways.

Can Alan Menken and Randy Newman please retire?  Every year these two have sappy, feel good numbers up for Best Song.  If we promise not to make princess movies and talking toy tales can they please go away???  And what is Ryan Adams doing with Mandy Moore???  I just don't get that one.

Other than that I was happy for Christian Bale.  He destroyed the role of Dicky Ecklund in The Fighter.  He may have lost his cool in that epic Terminator outtake...  but he remains one of the best actors working today.  Natalie Portman and Colin Firth were both deserving.  I will give Portman's marriage 3 years, tops.  Seems very Dancing With the Stars at best.  Girl makes ballet movie.  Ballet instructor lifts her and wears tights.  Girl digs it cause the role makes her crazy.  Wait til the kid is in school and she takes on the sexy femme fatale role.  I see an on set romance in her future again for sure.

And can I stop hearing Halle Barre talk about women of color and their plight?  She and Lena Horne are/were both whiter than some of the white women I know.  Oprah can talk about women of color.  If Mo'Nique and Jennifer Hudson bring the knowledge, I will listen.  Even Tyler Perry and Martin Lawrence are more believable black women.

Ok, that might be harsh.  But really, what has Halle Barre done lately?  And while I am at it...  Monster's Ball was overrated.

Sometimes the Academy tries too hard.  Old folks (I count myself as one) like and pay for movies.  We do not need gimmicks or schtick at the Oscars.  As much as I can't stand Billy Crystal he was best suited for the job.  Lampooning Hollywood should be an easy and welcome gig.  Come out, do 20 minutes reviewing the year in pictures, bust balls, move the show on accordingly.  When you come back from commercial make a joke or two about the next presenter or ad-lib and move the show accordingly.  No need to reinvent the wheel here.  Celebrate the movies.  Give out the trophies.  See you next year.

And can someone please put an end to Ryan Seacrest too???  His over the top vocal delivery and willingness to kiss any and all ass unnerves me beyond repair.

Suburbandad: out

2 comments:

  1. Maybe the more interesting Q is should 18-30 year olds know about Bob Hope and GWTW and everything that came before this weekend's list of top grossers? What % do you think know where the name "Oscar" comes from? And if they don't care, why bill them as that or even as The 83rd Annual Academy Awards? Wouldn't they be more relatable as "The 2010 AMPAS Bestie Awards?"

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  2. Franco was funny when he goofed on Charlie S but maybe overshadowed by how much he may have enjoyed wearing the makeup and dress???

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