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Friday, December 2, 2011

Every Kiss begins with...

Hard to avoid Kay Jewelers and Lexus these days, isn't it???  That Lexus jingle has been pounding through my head for the past few nights.  Funny thing is if a bow wrapped Lexus appeared in my driveway it would send me into a state of shock.

"How did you pay for this?"  "Is it stolen??" "Can you drive one of these things if you don't own a leather briefcase??"

The ads must be effective otherwise we would not be subjected to them every year.  Today, somewhere very close to this suburban oasis, a over-tanned salesman will close the deal on a new luxury Christmas ride.  Maybe next year...  For the record the Audi A8 ads are far better.  If this Elf that has been popping around my house all week is watching adults he might want to take note.  But you need not include the bow.  That's just pretentious.  Ok, redundantly pretentious.

But probably no more so than this blog.  So whatever.

Chill and effective:

Douche Chill and cringeworthy:

Oh, and it would be terrific I could get away with a Kay piece of jewelry for Christmas.  If they sold Tiffany boxes with their product things would be far easier.  If Santa met me at my tree and told me "she is gonna love this open heart thing from Kay" I would ask what the hell he smokes in the North Pole.  And may I have some please?

Where are the realistic Christmas ads???  Two disheveled parents walking through a mall buying themselves stuff for their spouses to wrap.

Wife "OK, I gotta get some things for some co-workers.  Gonna head to Bloomie's, then Game Stop, Apple, then might walk around Anthropologie and Nordstrom.  Text me and we will meet."

Husband:  "K, what do I do in the meantime?"

Wife:  "Go to Gap, J Crew or whatever and see if you like anything.  You need a wallet or something right?"

Husband:  "Right, and I can get a Starbucks."

There, 8 stores mentioned in a 30 second spot.  And far more realistic than a conversation with Santa in my living room and an $80,000 car out front.  Can people really keep that kind of purchase from someone they live with???  Good for them!!!

One more thing about the ad game...  what on Earth are the good people at Fiat thinking???  One, they choose JLo to rep their product.  That is a mistake on many levels, namely can you picture her driving a car, let alone a Fiat???  Then they center a campaign around Ms Lopez going back to her roots and driving through the gritty streets of the Bronx???  OK, if and when JLo heads back to her roots do we really believe she does not go back without armed security??  Truth is she probably moved everyone she cared about out of the Bronx decades ago.  You now how much scratch the Fly Girls made!!  Now she has Marc Anthony money.  Fugetaboutit.

Ok, put that all aside and now revelations that it was a body double driving in the Bronx.  And that the car broke down during filming!!  And now a lawsuit over using graffiti artists work without their permission???  Gee whiz did this agency go to the "What to do wrong in Advertising Seminar???"  Don't get fooled by the rocks that they got...  or

2011 in Music Part 2:  The Hits keep on coming!!!

A few artists, some old, some brand new, are releasing new albums in the next few months.  Look for new albums from Black Keys, Snow Patrol, Sleigh Bells, Lana Del Ray and Silversun Pickups in addition to the J Bieber and Michael Buble Christmas Albums.

Here are some more notable selections that are sure to please.

Kate Bush released her new album,  50 Words of Snow just in time for winter.  It is cold and haunting like most of her work.  There is an optimism to her words and inherent feeling of joy.  The claymation video for her first single, "Misty" is a nice introduction to the record.  The songs are piano heavy and long exercises in abstraction.  It all boils down to Bush's voice.  The good news is it is as beautiful as ever.  Try to disagree:  Super creepy and odd video too.

Tori Amos often gets compared to Bush and really, why not?  They are piano virtuosos with elegant and powerful voices.  Amos plays 2 nights at NYC's Beacon Theatre starting tonight (count me in this evening!)  supporting her new release Night of Hunters.   Like Bush, Amos has crafted a sit-by-the-fireplace winter's tale.    Seems like just yesterday she was "Silent All These Years."  Now she is making records with her 15 year old daughter.  Oh, and that daughter's voice is off the charts good!  Here she is at piano playing "Nautical Twilight"  Not for everyone for sure.  Either was Beethoven, or Bach, or Elvis, or The Beatles.

Keeping with the female songstress please turn your attention to Lana Del Ray.  Here is all you need to know.  She is a 25 year American singer/songwriter.  Her first LP was released for a minute before being pulled from her label due to a conflict.  It seems it may be released next year which we all benefit from.  Here is the latest release, "Born to Die" which displays not only her naked body, but a good, melancholy groove.  Sounds like an oxymoron but take a listen and come up with a better description.  She is another in a long list (Dum Dum Girls, Cults to name 2) blending 80s synth with 50s lounge.  David Lynch has new soundtrack material.  Her other release,  "Video Games", amounts to her dance hit: Amos and Bush would be most proud of this diddy.  Smart, simple and wonderful.

Last year David Fincher's "The Social Network" was helped considerably by Trent Reznor's masterful score.  He and Fincher have teamed up once again for the upcoming "Girl With The Dragon Tattoo."  A few things...  love that star Daniel Craig piled onto the Kardashians early this week:  He seems to be taking this James Bond thing very seriously.  Lighten up Daniel...  after all didn't you steal someone's wife a year ago?  Now that I have heard Reznor and Karen O (from the Yeah Yeah Yeah's) version of Led Zeppelin's MOST OVERPLAYED efforts, "The Immigrant Song", the film has become more compelling.  As film is most effective when ALL parts work together this piece is an encouraging sign.

Getting back to the tangent that began this blog, Holiday advertising, take a look/listen to English rockers new track "Tongue Tied."  You may know it as the latest in Apple's catchy Iphone selling diddies.  Just as their products are the coolest, so too are their supervising music producers for product placement.  Wonder if they are hiring??  Oh wait, I don't own skinny jeans.  Bummer.  May as well take a look at their first hit too...  "Colours"  Oh, and they will be touring with Young the Giant in the Spring.  Should be a fun show indeed.  For dates and other info:

Finally, California rockers Silversun Pickups are slated to release a new LP early next year.  A few tracks have made their way online and it bodes well.  It is more moody, emo rock similar to Smashing Pumpkins.  It's the Holidays...  you are supposed to be grumpy!  Do I have that mixed up?  Anyway, enjoy the music and your weekend.

PS game ball to Seahawks!!!

1 comment:

  1. ...interesting thing to note about the Kay adds is Jane Seymour and her "heart" collection...I saw the "hearts" while passing by Kay's and noticed that most of Jane's pendants resemble a set of...well, boobs. Now if this was dearly departed Farah doing this...what would we say?